Do you feel guilty because you:
- Aren’t doing enough?
- Aren’t being enough?
- Say ‘Yes’ when you want to say ‘No’?
If you do, then isn’t it time for you to ditch the guilt, relax and start having fun?
And what about those other feelings that you have, but are pretty sure that you shouldn’t?
Like feeling grumpy, tired, snappy, isolated, jealous, angry, envious, weak, sad, overwhelmed, resentful, fed up, anxious. (All of these increase your stress levels, and reduce your fun.)
In short, you aren’t quite perfect.
Everyone wants a ‘piece of you’
Everyone wants a piece of you, and you might be losing the sense of who you are, what you need, what you like or what you want to do with your life.
Or maybe you do know, but can’t see how you could ever achieve it.
Deep down, somehow you have come to believe that you must do it all on your own, or else you have failed.
Guilty feelings are hard to pin down, and can sneak in when you aren’t looking. Many come from childhood messages received from authority figures, as a way of keeping control and managing behaviour.
Are you giving out endlessly without replenishing your own resources?
This is like trying to pour countless cups of tea from a tiny tea pot, and never refilling it. If you continue to do so, you are likely to end up with stress headaches, digestive problems, insomnia, high blood pressure and more.
It’s time to put yourself first and learn to say ‘No’
It isn’t selfish to put yourself first and to say ‘No’, despite what you may have been taught to believe. If you are not ok, how can you fulfill your responsibilities for work and family without becoming ill, and unable to continue?
Why is it so important to have fun?
Fun makes us laugh and smile, with many benefits.
The boost of endorphins or happy hormones
- Relieves stress and pain
- Soothes tension
- Boosts the Immune System, protecting your health
- Increases creativity
- Promotes problem-solving
- Lifts your mood, self-confidence and sense of well-being
- Enables you to create and build good relationships in your personal and professional life
- Reduces blood pressure
When did you last have some fun?
If it is a while since you even thought of fun, never mind enjoying some, take a few minutes and think about
- what you have enjoyed doing in the past
- what you are good at doing
- what you secretly long to do
You can write a list or collect pictures from magazines and stick them on a board.
Start with something simple, today – right now
Keep it simple as you get into the way of it….
Smile, laugh, give someone a hug, bop around the kitchen to some upbeat music while the kettle boils, sit and read a magazine for ten minutes with a cuppa.
Do it just for you……
Then build up to something bigger….. the more fun you have, the more energised you will be.
What are you going to do today to have some fun? Please add a comment below, and say how it affected you.
Where are those guilty feelings now?
Hopefully you have shown them the door, but if it feels impossible to get started, or you would like some encouragement and support, email or contact me for a chat.
You might also be interested in the workshops that Katrina Wood and I run for women. Check out our website www.your7steppingstones.co.uk and FaceBook page, where you can catch up with our latest news. We are both happy to answer any questions, and if there is a group happening soon, you can book your place.
©Jenny Cooper 2014